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[TOP 4] Relationship Topics Couples DON’T Discuss Until It’s Too Late

Though it’s unfortunate, MOST try to avoid the complicated topics while dating in hopes of them ‘going away.’  But here’s the “ugly truth,” THEY NEVER DO! And what we’ve come to realize is that the longer you wait to have certain ‘vital’ conversations, the worst the outcome!

Simply put:

Don’t wait until you’re getting SERIOUS or madly in love to put your significant other in a compromising position!

So what we’ve done is complied a list of topics that you need to discuss before things get to a point of “no return” within a relationship. And we suggest that you have these conversations at some point during the “dating” phase.

No. 1: Children!

Therapist report roughly half of the couples that seek out help, come to their first session with one of the following questions:

  • We don’t have kids and my partner doesn’t want any! What should I do? Should I leave?
  • I have children from a previous relationship and my partner doesn’t feel comfortable around them?
  • We have a child together and I want more, but my spouse doesn’t? What should I do?

We’ve heard a lot of people say that they’d rather date the person for a few months prior to revealing that they either have a child and/or don’t want any, and that’s completely UNFAIR!

By either the 3rd or 4th date, there should be a conversation about children! Whether you want and/or have any, and how many? Regardless of the outcome, this happens to be the number one reason why many relationships fail.

HAVE THE TALK!

No.2: Finances!

Now this one is tricky, but it’s the NO.2 reason MOST relationships don’t make it past a few months.

We’re not suggesting that on the first date you know EVERYTHING about their finances, but for starters you need to know what’s their source of income! Where does he/she work?

And then as time goes on, pay attention to how they spend money! Values…..Savings……Investing, how important are those things to the person your dating? And have they already gotten started?

YOU NEED TO KNOW!

Nothing’s worse than getting into a relationship with someone who’s HORRIBLE with money management. It’s literally a SLOW ‘downward spiral’ for the BOTH of you.

HAVE THE TALK!

No.3: Relationships [Exes/Friends With Benefits]

Simply put: “Where does those relationships stand?” and “Who are they?”

It’s NOT about re-living the past! Instead it’s about being honest and making the person that you’re dating feel comfortable and secure. The same feeling you should be receiving!

Don’t go into detail about past relationships etc…. But just ask when the last one ended? Where those feelings stand? Are there kids involved, and if so, what’s co-parenting like?

And in the instance where there may be a “friends with benefits” situation, are you still sleeping around?

YOU must make sure that you’re NOT about to place yourself in a situation where you’re going to be hurt [whether male/female].

HAVE THE TALK!

No. 4: Boundaries!

It’s a MUST that you talk about boundaries!

What are the things that will make you walk away?

What can’t you tolerate from your spouse?

What are your thoughts on infidelity? 

Dating and/or relationships should NOT be a “guessing game!”

Let them know up front what you can/ can’t tolerate, and how serious you are about knowing your worth when it comes to certain things.

HAVE THE TALK!

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